Losing a loved one is devastating, and the Coronavirus has made it even more difficult to cope with. Some people have not been able to be with their loved ones in their last hours or have not been able to have the funeral or memorial that they would have liked. This, together with the increased anxiety and isolation of the lockdown, has made it very difficult for some people to grieve.
An article on Cruse Bereavement Care’s website says: “We are in a situation where remaining physically isolated from others has been sadly necessary… This isolation can make feelings of loneliness and grief much more intense.”
There is no right or wrong way to deal with a death. There are no rules about how you should be feeling, by when. But the important thing is that you do allow yourself to grieve in a way that is right for you. Our emotional and wellbeing co-ordinator, Amanda, says: “Try not to compare yourselves to others or to be influenced by what other people think or say. We all cope with difficult situations differently; we are not weak if we cry in front of others or if it takes us longer than we expected, to start to feel better.”
Here are some suggestions for coping with a bereavement:
Allow yourself to grieve, don’t tell yourself you ‘shouldn’t be feeling like this’, and try not to compare yourself to how others are coping.
Talk about the person who has died, and about how you are feeling. This might be with a friend or family member or with a professional.
Help people to help you – tell them what you want them to do, even if this is to give you some space!
Eat well and try to get some exercise and sleep
Try not to isolate yourself. If you can’t see people face to face, try to speak to others over the phone, or through text messages, letters or emails
Where to go for more support:
Contact Deafblind UK’s helpline for emotional support or just to chat
Tel: 0800 132320
Text: 07950 008870
Text relay: 18001 then 0800 132320
Facetime: firstname.lastname@example.org (Not BSL)
BSL video relay: Please click here
www.cruse.org.uk has lots of information about grief and grieving
www.muchloved.com enables you to set up a virtual memorial for your loved one